I miss you already...sniff!

I cant help it if i am eccentric. I try to be less difficult but sometimes people do step on my head. And i will feel shitty for allowing them to step all over me. I am angry and I am mad with frustration. But all these lips can utter are "It's ok" and "I'm all right."

Went Suntec during lunch time. Walked around and had a Delifrance lunch. Took a train to Buona Vista to collect my manuscripts which by the way, are still burdened with so many amendments. Fine. Took a cab back to work. Cabby yaya-papaya ignored my instructions of going through PIE and he headed to AYE instead. Okay fine. Maybe it was a route which i had not discovered. Halfway..when the meter ran $6, he said "sorry" for it was the wrong way and he got the directions wrong. I was seething with anger inside but what could i do?

Cabby kept on yakking on how he got my destination confused with Jurong Town Corporation (yeah..they are just adjacent to each other, right?). I just stared out of the window, trying to control my words and mannerisms. Occasionally i gave a lame smile and an "It's ok." And then ..

Me: Can we exit at Braddell later on the CTE?
Taxi fucking driver: No lah..we go CTE..then I go by ECP exit at Tanjong Katong and then go to Paya Lebar.
Me: Oh, that's a better way?
Tfd: Ya! Why you want to exit Braddell?
Me: Hmm..because it is nearer?


He shut up and i found myself cruising down Braddell. I agree the Tanjong Katong's view will be nicer but what the fuck...that is a different route altogether.

Tfd: Miss..usually how much do you pay if go by PIE?
Me: Usually about 9 plus 10 dollars.
Tfd: 10 plus har?
Me: (thinking "I didnt say 10 plus!") Err..yeah.
Tfd: Later you just pay me $11only lah.
Me: (staring at the $14 stated on the meter) Oh ok, thanks.

Yeah. Nice gesture. But usually I paid lesser. I couldnt be bothered to say that. Oh fuck off!

waterworks alert!

It is siang boon, cai mo and medy's last day. Medy brought red wine and now, at 1730(happy)hrs, most of the office people are walking around red-faced. Gonna miss them. Gonna miss medy most. Gonna miss her so bad I am already planning to visit her in Perth come October.

Went upstairs..we hugged. We cried. Miss you, Auntie Medy.

Stupid tears...

My Vespa Man

Wondered why didnt i blog last night. I guess...figuring how to un-mess the alignment and stuff kind of killed the mood to write. Eh bimbo Dear, thanks for the URLs but I have seen them all before during those nights of template-hopping. Nah..not my type. Paiseh...

Kiong sent us his wedding pictures last night. Though some were sweet..most were, i am so sorry, gagging.

(will post his pictures soon)

Kiong you looked so stiff and haha your hair still looks like a toilet brush. But hey...all superficialities aside, i think you will make a great husband to liting. I have known you for 7 years through the ex-girlfriends and scandals and well, all those were a thing of the past. So here is an advanced greeting, before the wedding on Sunday, may you have a blissful marriage until the end of forever. May you stay together, have kids and grow old in blessed matrimony.

But my dear black-and-mat-wannabe cina friend, please..stay as gila babi as you always are, ok?



Noreen..Sha..Susan...how are you ladies doing?

Last night's badminton session was mad as always. Lauren, you have improved lah. And ismail, the end of the second set was fucking crappy. It wasnt like a badminton match but more like a shuttle run. But whatever it was, i beat you!!! Twice! Let's analyse.

Your strengths lie in your serves and volleys. You serve strong but after a while, it gets predictable and i can just go straight to the back end of the court waiting for the shuttlecock. I know it will come high and strong. I guess weaknesses will be in stamina, predictability and recovery.

My turn. Here is how you can beat me.

As i have astigmatism, high plays will be quite a problem because the lights get into my eyes. Therefore, I have to wait until the shuttlecock drops lower before i can hit it. Also due to my build, I tend to go slow running to the net. My strengths i think lie in my back hand, quick recovery, stamina and court control. I aim to finish the sparring time a.s.a.p because the longer you play, the more vulnerable you are to slacking.

Ok we shall work on our weaknesses and improve our strengths. And no, I am not interested in a doubles' partnership. On the court, I am my own partner. Cedebah!



Oh yeah..I am supposed to describe my dream man here. Hah!


John Mayer.

He must share the same interests as i do, obviously..music, movies and nature. I dont want a snazzy dresser or a metrosexual-wannabe. Someone who is comfortable in t-shirt and boardshorts is definitely more appealing to me than someone who is stiff and stuffy in a shirt and pants. I dont really care about the hair, the skin colour, the race and nationality. And I dont set a criteria for height and weight and back account balance.

My man can be many things but not a drinker, philanderer, criminal, an illegal, a drug dealer, a pimp and any seedy creatures of the dark. I just want a boy-next-door and that is hard because everybody doesnt want to be the person-next-door anymore.

I want to spend our time climbing mountains and trekking and becoming eco-tourists. Or just doing nothing on a slow day. Someone who is not easily ruffled or petty will be high up there on the list. Ability to play guits is a definite plus point. If he has a vehicle, i can imagine him having a retro-looking Vespa. Loves classic rock and old Motown, old romantic movies, into Science and Maths, Hahaha..let me continue daydreaming.

And in the meantime, I can still be on my own.

Oh, that stupid Danker still hasnt called me regarding the UK trip. Asshole. Okay back to work.It's Medy's last day today and well...i am sad. And I will be very very sad comes 6pm. Man...

###

There's GOTTA be more to life...

First, it was the photo issue. Now, it is the alignment crap. It does not help that i cant remember any of those html shite i had learnt back in poly. Idiots like me truly deserve diaryland.com.

SUCKER!

My dad had a minor accident at home yesterday. I didnt know my house was not really safe. The potted plant under the window fell and cut his face. My mama sent him to SGH and he got 14 stitches. My lao bu sms-ed me saying that my dad’s face was koyak (torn). Got me panic a bit...only to realise when i came back that it was not that horrible.Cis!



I watched The Wedding Date last night. Though the plot is all fluff and barf..I have to say that Dermot Mulroney is one hell of a charming guy. And he looks so good..not in a super-buff, superfly way but man...endearing..i cant describe it. Just charming.

But the movie is not that great. The plot is tired and cliched. Debra Messing, as compared to Grace (of Will & Grace) is not as fun to watch. Guys, especially single guys, go spend your money on BE COOL instead. It is silly but hey, at least it is not depressing.



Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has a new fan. Me!





Another dance..kind of brought back some Jack Rabbit memories.

Oh well.

I am still pondering whether i should join the colleagues on Friday at East Coast. Though I am fine with the original gang, the new line up (hah..macam Ocean’s 12) is well..um..uncomfortable and Betsy knows why. I am glad that she understands where I am coming from. Still, i dont want to put her in a spot. Think think think.

Wee Wee says she will come if i go..i love to meet up with her. Havent seen her in 2 weeks. I think i should give it a go this Friday and bring Wee Wee in. I will just ignore that one person. Yeah..it is just one person.

I am actually fine with that person. But, i think that person still has a personal vendetta against me. So yeah..like i told betsy, that is the person’s problem. Heh. So i guess..all the more i should go. Maybe i make it a last time. I have enough of being around drinkers for the time being. Clubbing, excluded.

I've got it all, but I feel so deprived
I go up, I come down and I'm emptier inside
Tell me what is this thing that I feel like I'm missing
And why can't I let go

There's gotta be more to life
Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I'm
Tripping out thinking there must be more to life
Well it's life, but I'm sure
There's gotta be more
Than wanting more

I've got the time and I'm wasting it slowly
Here in this moment I'm half way out the door
Onto the next thing I'm searching
For something that's missing

There's gotta be more to life
Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I'm
Tripping out thinking there must be more to life
Well it's life, but I'm sure
There's gotta be more
Than wanting more – There’s Gotta Be More To Life, Stacie Orrico

Yup. Bodycombat tomorrow. Gathering Friday. NPCC Saturday. Gathering Saturday. Weddings Sunday. Tonight...BADMINTON!

I like to move it, move it.

###

Finally

I was cryin when i met you..

I put B, R, E, A, S and T in my mouth. I swallowed D, I, C and K. Ah...alphabet soup.


There was a time
When I was so broken hearted
Love wasn't much of a friend of mine
The tables have turned, yeah
'Cause me and them ways have parted
That kind of love was the killin' kind
Listen, all I want is someone I can't resist
I know all I need to know by the way that I got kissed

I was cryin' when I met you
Now I'm tryin' to forget you
Love it sweet misery
I was cryin' just to get you
Now I'm dyin' 'cause I let you
Do what you do down on me

Now there's not even breathin' room
Between pleasure and pain
Yeah you cry when we're makin' love
Must be one and the same

It's down on me
Yeah I got to tell you one thing
It's been on my mind
Girl, I gotta say
We're partners in crime
You got that certain something
What you give to me
Takes my breath away
Now the word out on the street
Is the devil's in your kiss
If our love goes up in flames
It's a fire I can't resist

I was cryin' when I met you
Now I'm tryin' to forget you
Your love is sweet misery
I was cryin' just to get you
Now I'm dyin' 'cause I let you
Do what you do to me
'Cause what you got inside
Ain't where your love should stay
Yeah, our love, sweet love, ain't love
'Til you give your heart away - Cryin', Aerosmith

Steve Tyler did a duet of this song with Christina Millian on BE COOL and well, she butchered this classic. Better dont let my dad hear this. He will cry a thousand rocker's tears. Apart from that technical glitch, BE COOL was a damn funny show. For 2 hours, i forgot that i had a pair of aching legs (no thanks to the heels) and ..The Rock? As a gay bodyguard/dancer/singer/actor? My god, he is smokin'!

Can you smeeeeellllll what The Rock is cooking?

He is a reason big enough to just watch the silly show! Every good scene has he in it. Awrite. Go catch it. It is a cool show.

(This is where I would normally insert a photo. But this blogsite is screwed up. So..Meh!)

I was reading the papers and watching Everybody Loves Raymond at about 1210hrs when my mom and i felt some tremors. Indeed it was about for a minute but it felt like an eternity. So much so that I got motion sickness. Yes, believe you me. My wall ornament was rattling and I staggered to the door. My first thought, "Damn those construction workers did a bad job!" but on second thought, shit. Another earthquake in Indonesia. True, indeed!

My mom woke my sis up and together with my half-naked dad, we all sat in the living room, waiting for CNA to give us the beef. 10 minutes passed, my sis went back to sleep and i nursed a nauseating headache. Took a shower, switched on the computer for more news and got myself a mug of pseudo-cold milk. Chatted with Fifi, Lauren and Ting for a while and at 0200hrs, i emergency shut down everything, ran to the loo and puked my guts out into the toilet bowl.

Lauren..i think it was your Heineken beer, plus the motion, plus the milk.

Hah, right. I think it is the milk.

O well. My agent called me and well, what else, it is all about the Yusof Ishaks! That's money, for the uninitiated. Man. I hate this money shit. But then again, i truly deserve this crap for i was the "itchy" one with the insurance policies.

Never mind. Never mind. These are only worldly matters. There is only so much they can do to you.

All right. Meeting sharinah and meiling tonight for another free movie premiere. Thanks to meiling, we are going to watch THE WEDDING DATE. Kinda miss working in the media line. Though the perks are so..chi-chi but well, they are free!

Yes..I am a media whore.

###

photo attempt

http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5dd09b3127cce90a4c99cb2ed00000015108AcsmTVy0ctP"/>

nope..i still cant do it jay...


###

I love Rotiboy!

Move closer
Set my mind on fire
Taking over
The world seems so alive
The world seems so alive

She slips into the night, and she is gone
Gone to set the score
Gone into the town
Rain shining in her eyes
Her brother started school again today
A thought to pass the time
To occupy my mind
While I'm waiting for her

Down in the basement
Listening to the rain
Thinking things over
I think it over again
Think it over again
- Goldfinger, Ash


http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b5df31b3127cce904c82b4376200000035108AcsmTVy0ctP">


As you can see...pictures are still a no-go. ni na bei!

What a lazy Sunday! Was in bed till almost 1500hrs and from then onwards, it was just chillin' - on the floor, on the sofa, in front of the tv. Took a much needed shower at 2000hrs and then went down to AMK Central to buy some toiletries, rotiboys and some food items for my textbook photoshoot. Went back home..set the table .. and had me mom and sis act a scenario. Things you do for work.

i guess the reason why i had a loooong sleep was because of soccer. Well..erm..I am watching the match between Brazil and Peru right now..at 0300hrs. It's Brazil. I have to see it. Doesnt mean that I can last the whole match...but for the love of kakaronaldorobinhoronaldinhocafurobertocarlos, i will try. For it is..indeed..a beautiful game.

Anyway..I am not a sucker for malay songs..or malay men (but I digressed)..however, this can be a gem. Depends on how you see it. Share!

Ku dikejar bayang-bayang resah
Bila hatimu masih tak berubah
Enggan dipunah dan dipenjara
Belaian cintaku ini
Aku bukan lelaki yang tewas
Bisa meradang walau ku di tolak
Bila diuji kanan dan kiri
Kau kan tetap ku miliki

Tiada lafaz yang lebih agung
Kalimah cintamu
Yang ku tunggu-tunggu
Biar jasadku yang menanggung
Permainan darimu
Rela ku pujuk

Janganlah kau salahkan aku
Terus memburu menawan cintamu
Daku percaya
Sedikit masa kau kecundang akhirnya

Usahlah kau bersedih
Di hadapanmu aku hadir
Memadam resah dan curiga dari hatimu

Apa yang kau ingini
Bisa kau tolak dan berlari
Ssetelah aku tanamkan
Azimat ku

Tiada lafaz yang lebih agung
Kalimah cintamu
Yang ku tunggu-tunggu
Biar jasadku yang menanggung
Permainan darimu
Rela ku pujuk - Relaku Pujuk, Spider


Awrite. Focus on the game, Mona. Focus. Focusz...zzzz....zzzz...

A thousand times goodnight, sporty Brazilians.


###

My good saturday...

Juggling 2 blogs is kind of tiring. Why am i still doing it then? I dont know. Diaryland.com has been a friend for so long and it is hard to leave it behind. But on the other hand, it has been getting quite problematic lately. I think it is a sign of old age. Maybe it is time to let go. Just like some other aspects of life.

Your Love Style is Eros

For you, love is all about the passion! And chances are, you're currently in love. You have a strong physical response to love... And you are great at committing (As long as the person makes your toes curl!)

What's Your Love Style?

In love? You must be kidding.

You scored as Soft. You are nice and soft, you love everyone and everyone loves you, while you are fiery or too exciting, you are always pleasant. Soft 94% Wet 63% Sweet 56% Shy 50% Hot 44% Exciting 44% Awkward 19% Violent 0% What is your sexual style? created with QuizFarm.com

I think they've got it wrong. My style is Awkward. Why? Because I am always clueless, bumbling and fumbling.

You scored as The Notebook. You have strong, passionate love like the notebook! The Notebook 92% A Cinderella Story 75% Mean Girls 67% Charlies Angels 58% Legally Blonde 25% What Chick Flick is just like Your Life? created with QuizFarm.com

Man...It should be The Truth About Cats and Dogs. I am Janeane Garofalo. Hahaha.

You scored as Crisis-maker. Your procrastination type the crisis-maker, the procrastinator who loves to live on the edge. This procrastinator is addicted to the adrenaline of the last-minute challenge. However, this form of procrastination often leads to missing deadlines, since living on the edge is a risky business. Crisis-maker 94% Perfectionist 69% ADD 69% Dreamer 69% Worrier 63% Defier/rebel 63% Teenager 50% Not a procrastinator 25% Overdoer 19% What type of procrastinator are you? created with QuizFarm.com

OK OK OK...last one.

You scored as Rock and Roll RockStar. You a Rock and Roll Rock Star! You like to play classic guitars and listen to classic music. You like Van Halen, Led Zepplin and The Who. Rock and Roll RockStar 80% Punk Rockstar 80% Emo Rockstar 40% Metal Rockstar 20% Goth Rockstar 20% What kind of Rockstar are you? created with QuizFarm.com

Awrite enough of that.

I am having quite a tough time. The weather is killing me. The heat is giving me rashes and I seem to be showering close to 3 times a day. Man, times like this I wish I have an air-con. And a cosy bed. Snuggle. Heaven.

I am very tired. Had a steamboat lunch with Medy and colleagues...it was just okay for me. Nothing fantastic apart from the company I had. Went shopping for a while with Dear and Betsy. Wanted to go for hiphop class at 1630hrs but the plan was thwarted cause i was still kind of full.

That was a lie. I was too busy shopping. And i bought an esprit top for $20...after a 70% discount. Why am i still spending? Well I threw away some clothes and will be throwing a few more. I need some clothes ;p

Hung out with betsy at taka's coffee beans before going to gym at 1800hrs. She wanted to do a bit of studying there so i left (after "arguing" over Darwin's nonsensical theory of evolution) her and headed to Cali. Since it was too late to go for hiphop, i pounded the treadmill (a new hobby) with utmost concentration. the music was helpful. Kiss' I Was Made For Loving You made me want to run as far as possible from Gene Simmons. After that, I dragged my leaden legs to bodycombat and met meiling in class. I must say the new moves are a killer. Nabei! I have to push push push mysel. Jab, punch, kick, upper cut, elbow, arm roll, flying kick and urgh..the gay YMCA moves. Was sweating like a pig on ecstacy, boxing to techno. Pig on speed!

i think i am going to get me those shiny muay thai boxing shorts...with motifs on them. THen before bodycombat, I am going to do those dance rituals performed by thai kickboxers. I kind of "learnt" them during my 1 week stay in Thailand that time. Heck, I will burn some incense. Let others freaked out.

Met betsy again after that and we had some sandwiches for dinner before going home. was just in time to catch the Eng-ger-len versus Norden A-yer-len ...I am sorry but Owen sucks.

Aye me.

Think i will skip gym tomorrow. So sorry, Deepak. Body is too tired. Unfortunately I may have to skip yoga on Tuesday too. When it comes to movies and everything else, it has to be movies.

Damn. It is Sunday already and Ting, I have a piece of news for you. Will tell you when you are online.

Till then, a thousand times goodnight, dream-makers.


###

Headache!

Okay...I am still doing up this blog and am having some problems. I cant seem to put up my pictures. I did do the img src thingy...not working!

Diaryland is still screwed-up. I think it is over and done for. Man, all my past entries! Sheesh, it is like losing your diaries. I had a lot of memories in there. Man!

Wait. Let me go and check. Eh, can already!

Now I have 2 blogs.

Damn.

Why the hell do I need 2 blogs for?

What a screw-up!

###

Sucky!

This was suppose to be Wednesday's entry. Diaryland's damn fucked up nowadays.

================================================================

Finally got round to do the resume. Phew. But expectations are really not high. But it is ok. There are many other doors waiting to be knocked.

Had a super long meeting this morning. The usual MT rubbish. I really appreciate Richard standing up for me in terms of workload but honestly, I have come to a point of "Whatever."

You want to give me more jobs, whatever. You want to reduce my workload, whatever. You want to terminate me, whatever. It is not like i dont give a damn anymore. It is just that i am built like a sponge, I can take it no matter what. Deadlines and quality are sometimes compromised but ah, i think the management knows that. They are the ones who know.

Went MOE after lunch and what a lovely and crispy day. Fell asleep on the train all the way to Buona Vista. Good sleep, I say. Had a short meeting with Tajudin and collected the stupid manuscripts. Still cant be filmed because those little fucking papers have many corrections on them. Goes to show that mistakes will always be made no matter at which level.

Went back to office in style. Red London cab, no less. It was so weird and awkward. The cab was so spacious and it had many functions which i had no idea what they were for. I was soooo sleepy but i couldnt fall asleep lest the cabby didnt know the way. Oh well.

Oh the things you can do at the back of a London cab! hehehehehe..


Going to Great World City with Betsy later. We are going to catch the special premiere of Miss Congeniality 2.. thanks to Meiling, who will meet me there. How to get there? You know what I am tired. But importantly, it is pay day..let us take a cab.

Let there be cabs

Okay enough happiness. We all need a little bit of everything. I had anger and resignation already. Soon, i will get some cheap happy entertainment from the movie. Here is a bit of sadness for today. To all who has loved and lost.

When it's over
That's the time I fall in love again
And when it's over
That's the time you're in my heart again
And when you go go go go
I know, it never ends, never ends

All the things that I used to say
All the words that got in the way
All the things that I used to know
Have gone out the window
All the things that she used to bring
All the songs she used to sing
All the favourite TV shows
Have gone out the window

I'm missing you
I never knew how much she'd loved me
I'm missing you
I never knew how much you meant to me
I need you and when you go go go go
I know, it never ends, never ends

All the things that I used to say
All the words that got in the way
All the things that I used to know
Have gone out the window
All the things that she used to bring
All the songs she used to sing
All the favourite TV shows
Have gone out the window - When It's Over, Sugar Ray

Fret not. The song has a chirpy beat. That, my friend, is positivity.

Later.

###

I need to do this.

I need a new blog and here it is.

TADA!