Monday Bitter Shopping

Realised CY2 also posted her loot. But I am an upset girl..and an upset girl can do anything she god damn wants. Haha.


Still reeling from yesterday’s “betrayal” (how childish can I get?) and so I jumped at Nani’s invite to shop. She picked me up at 1515hrs and soon we were off to town. 7 hours later…I wished I didn’t go out at all. Btw, I am not putting up the prices so as not to remind myself. Denial is kind.

First stop, Borders.


Finally got The Sea, The Sea by Iris Murdoch. Couldn’t find The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath and so I decided to pay the ‘K’ shelf a visit. Voila, a book from my favourite author…The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. Read it already 5 years ago… but I have to own it in order to pass it to my kids, right?


Then we moved on to Mango where Nani wanted to “deposit” her voucher. But everything was so expensive there (duh) and so we moved on to Tangs, where Nani bought a skirt and a bag. We also bought a lovely present for one of the Sept babies. It’s really pretty, don’t worry.

Me?
Shoes…glorious shoes.



The Martina Pink wedges (I am in love with them useless wedges) are just girly-quirky and well, the black patent Hush Puppies heels look gorgeous. Am comfy enough to wear to school. Meow…


From there, we hopped over to Lucky Plaza where I met my new favourite girly man (shant say he’s gay because I am not sure of that) and got my Lovely perfume at a freaking big steal. But hold your horses for it is a tester set. A steal still, nevertheless.



After dinner at Lido, we skipped down to Isetan. Didn’t see anything nice. Probably because I wasn’t in the mood to get clothes. But that’s all right. Nani’s Mr D soon came to join us…for they were catching a 2130hrs show. I soon left them and headed downstairs to make my way to the MRT.

But what the hell…let’s just stop at the bag section.
Nah… didn’t fancy anything.
Then as I walked on..there they were.
Make-up!
And there was my favourite stop.
ANNA fucking SUI!

I bought blusher, mascara and a tube of lip gloss (oh so pretty!).




Shan’t say how much was the total damage…but it was enough to get me a free hamper consisting of a mini Anna Sui Dolly Girl perfume, a brightening powder sample, a liquid foundation, toner, a cleansing oil and a bag.




Soon the friendly announcement was made, announcing the impending closing time. Made my way home…finally. Got home and laid out my Anna Sui stash. I think it’s the packaging that did it for me. And also, the sweet rose scent in every product. Yeah…I heard you. You said “Sucker!” right? Heard you. Loud and clear.



Packed everything away…into the small drawer.


See.
I am not that big on make-up.
The drawer is practically empty ;)

Anyway, the damage could have been worst if I had bought this from The Island Shop.


But at $130, it was a tad too much.
Plus, a part of me felt like I was looking like a gypsy midget in a travelling fair and another part of me felt like I was a bloated bohemian Pocahontas. Although strangely, there was another part of me which really wanted it. Gah.


So yeah. I did spend quite a bit. And ..sigh..shall not spend anymore on shoes and make-up for the rest of the …year week month. And yeah..save the money earned from the next articles.

But I feel a bit happy.
Kind of forgotten that I was forgotten.
Gah, who needs them anyway.
I have been fine these couple of years without them.


Uh oh…still bitter apparently.


This is bad. I have to get it out of my sytem. Shall go for a walk and have a talk with God tomorrow.

A thousand times goodnight, bitter people. We have to learn to let it go. Let.it.go.

###

Aussie Croc Legend Dies

Crikey.

The Crocodile Hunter has passed away.

Is this crocodile karma?

But nevertheless I am sad. I like Steve Irwin.

Oh well.

###

Living in medieval times...

Grabbed these from Clara.


The pink brigade with Hello Kitty and Dear Daniel.


Had a totally unproductive Sunday. Woke up late. Wanted to clean my room but ended up wired to the laptop instead. The effort-inducing I did today were to take a long shower and to cut my black-painted nails. And yup, till now, I haven’t configured the MP3 player yet. Sometimes I wonder why do I need to get out of bed at all.

Yeah yeah.
It’s the ultimate sloth talking to you right now.

The BF was whining about the guy she has been seeing with. Apparently the guy told her that he was facing some heavy financial burden. He hinted to her that whoever would be his girlfriend would have to help him. That was what the BF told me and I think she meant “helping him financially.”

I was like…run away, girl! The burden was not necessary okay! It was to finance his car, his old debts incurred from his errant ways and not because it was to finance some parents’ medical bills or something. Why is it that his supposed girlfriend must help him?

I don’t know lah, girl.
Why is it that you always meet such dysfunctional men?
Just what kind of aura are you emitting?

Sometimes, when shit like this happens to people around me, I am just glad that I am single. Although I am wishing to have a wedding…a very gothic wedding at the National Museum grounds before I turn 30. Haiyah…how gothic? Think Victorian. Think Corpse Bride..hahaha. Think beautiful wedding dresses that common people find strange.




Okay okay…for now, it is safer to stay single. Besides, I haven’t found a guy who wants to have a gothic/medieval/renaissance/victorian wedding. Hah. I am so living in a different time zone.

Oh well.

A week of rest(oration) starts. And..an article waits to be written. And therefore, a thousand times goodnight, good dreamers. Don’t let others stop you. Especially in your quest for glory.

###

Leave me alone

Another one.
Why were we good friends back then again?
Only so that I could be forgotten in the future.
Wow..this hurts.
This hurts really bad.


Thanks Din for the kind words and the info. And I really appreciate the comforting words. We're tight and we're cool. No sweat. Dont worry, I will take it as it is. I have no qualms with you.


Old Guards, I take my leave.
Here's my badge.
Here's my gun.
With that, I am leaving a big part of my youth behind.
You guys have hurt me quite bad today.
I am very upset and disappointed.
You guys always forget that I am not like you people.
I am..a girl, after all.
I am not so "Aiyah, whatever".
So I will go take my leave.
I cant believe I am saying this...
But I hate you guys.

Fuck all of you.

###

Hungry ghost wears Puma

Hey I may be the girl-next-door (to who? The devil?) but let me tell you, I am a kick-ass girl-next-door, okay.

Anyway, at the “suggestion” of the newly-minted Wife, here is her favourite shot of…us.


They just came back from their Bali honeymoon and damn..both are sick at the moment. Ahem, too much fun, perhaps.

And babe, remember this one?



And yeah, it’s Aidil’s wedding day today. I didn’t go because simply, I wasn’t invited. Fifi asked me to come along, after all we have been friends for so long (8 years). He also said maybe the busy Groom had forgotten all about me. Yeah thanks. I feel so much better. Anyway, I just want to wish him and his broad wife a very happy marriage. That’s all.

Wait.
Still not happy.
We were very close leh!
I was even a middle person in one of his past relationships!
Don’t tell me his wife doesn’t like me okay.
Don’t tell me it’s true?
That men and women are certain point in their lives
Cant be as good friends as they used to be?

Sheesh.

Awrite. I am hungry like crazy. It’s almost 2000hrs and I haven’t even had breakfast. I hate it when the Kitchen God goes on strike. Gah!

When you first left me
I was wanting more
But you were fucking that girl next door
What’d you do that for
When you first left me
I didn’t know what to say
I’d never been on my own that way
Just slept by myself all day

I was so lost back then
But with a little help from my friends
I found the light in the tunnel at the end
Now you’re calling me up on the phone
So you can have a little whine and a moan
And it’s only because you’re feeling alone

At first when I see you cry
Yea it makes me smile
Yea it makes me smile
At worst I feel bad for awhile
But then I just smile
I go ahead and smile

Whenever you see me
You say that you want me back
And I tell you it don’t mean jack
No it don’t mean jack
I couldn’t stop laughing
No I just couldn’t help myself
See you messed up my mental health
I was quite unwell

I was so lost back then
But with a little help from my friends
I found the light in the tunnel at the end
Now you’re calling me up on the phone
So you can have a little whine and a moan
And its only because you’re feeling alone

At first when I see you cry
Yea it makes me smile
Yea it makes me smile
At worst I feel bad for awhile
But then I just smile
I go ahead and smile
I go ahead and smile
I go ahead and smile - Smile, Lily Allen


Oh yes I will smile. The sweetest smile you'll ever seen.
Then...watch out for the knife in my hand.

###

The details of your incompetence do not interest me

I've been so many places in my life of time
I've sung a lot of songs I've made some bad rhymes
I've acted all my life in stages
With ten thousand people watching
But we're alone and I'm and singing my song for you

I know your image of me is what I hope to be
I've treated you unkindly
But girl can't you see
There's no one more important to me
So darling can't you please see through me
Cos we're alone and I'm and I'm singing my song for you

You taught me precious secrets
The truth would fold in to nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I'm so much better
So if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody
'Cos my love’s in there to hide

I love you in a place where there is no space of time
I love you for my life cos you’re a friend of mine
And when my life is over
Remember, when we were together
We were alone…
And I was singing this song for you (A Song For You)


…you know you have it made..haha..when I eventually sing you a song.


CY2 and I walked the whole stretch of Orchard Road after the movie. I love long walks because you never know what kind of conversations you can have with your fellow walker. The walk also made me missed various people who used to go for walks with me at some points in my life. I miss my girls..i miss my guys..i miss everyone. I am fine doing things on my own but once in a while, I turn around and find that there is no one beside me..around me..behind me..in front of me. Sometimes, on some days, I think I can give up everything just to have someone to walk beside me and have endless conversations with. Easy..easy..dont cry.




CY2, Adrian, Shuxiang, Wan and I went to catch my much awaited THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA and yes yes I know it is a comedy but I couldn’t help feeling sad halfway into the show. Think it has to do with career-versus-interest and money-versus-passion issues which I can totally relate to right now. I mean..look at us (Andy and me). We are both journalism graduates who end up at a particular place, hoping that we will eventually be elevated and be taken to a place where we eventually be at. It is so not gonna happen, sister.

We bite dust and eat crow on our way to the top, hoping that eventually, it will all be justified. But what if that day never comes? How long must we take it all in before we eventually gather the balls and shove all the crap to a place where the sun doesn’t shine? And on top of that..imagine having to choose between love and a job which you don’t even like. Hope it will never happen to me. I really hope it wont.

CY2 said the ending was too perfect. I beg to differ. A perfect ending will be her boyfriend going over to Paris, apologising for being an insensitive jerk, changing his fashion and Andy being made into an editor. Hah. But we know that doesn’t happen.

And oh yeah… this is rhetorical and it is stupid. But just let me load it off my (heaving) chest. Why is it easy for people to be in love with someone and yet make love to another? Okay..maybe I am confusing making love with fucking here…but still?

But still…?
Oh well.

Maybe we'll live and learn
Maybe we'll crash and burn
Maybe you'll stay
Maybe you'll leave
Maybe you'll return
Maybe we'll never fight
Maybe we won't survive
Maybe we'll grow
We'll never know
Baby you and I… (Ordinary People, John Legend)


A thousand times goodnight, lonely people.


P/S: I am inspired to wear more dresses and dress-up more. But to where?


###

Making it work

...other dancers may be on the floor
but dear my eyes can see only you
only you have that magic technique
when we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
long before it begins
make me thrill as only you know how
sway me smooth
sway me now...


And indeed I go weak. But this time it wasnt for any boy (it's not that easy, okay) or pretty little things. This time it's for pretty huge things, okay!

I have to hold on to my card at Comex (two nights in a row) and pray that I do not make hasty purchases like a flatscreen monitor, a Nintendo gameboy and many other no-so-important but oh-so-necessary accessories. While waiting for the guys to appear, I have already bought a laptop cooler and a screen protector.

Anyway, yeah I finally bought the printer+copier+scanner from Brother and the Creative Zen Neeon MP3 player. No I didnt succumb to the one that can play MP4 because...sigh..I dont need it.




It took a lot of will-power not to get anything else..afterall..it was pay day. BUT i managed not to exceed my budget (money from the writing job) and phew..the salary still remained untouched. Man...i think i will be an uber-techie geek if I am earning twice the amount I am earning now. Already right now, the house is so wired/plugged/amped up with electronic stuff belonging to the brother and me.

We need a new house.




Okay...the last one is a shot of a room in Ritz Carlton. Which I really, really like. Gah!

Think I configured the MP3 later tonight or tomorrow. I was too tired to do it last night. I reached home at about 2230hrs and i fell asleep 10 mins after! All the way till 1100hrs this morning. I was that tired. Thank God there was no NPCC. Thank you, God.

[Take a deep breath]


AWRITE.

I need to kickstart my weekend...in fact, the long week ahead of unemployment. Gonna meet the SF gang later for a bit of dinner and mucking around at Cash studio. Yeah...KTV again. And maybe later I'll catch me a movie or something. And if I am still alive after that, I shall go mustafa centre. And ..sigh..eventually start on the article once I get home.


I cant wait for next week. Long walks in the day that will go on till night...writing my article all over the country...and exploring new places. If only I have friends who are free enough to be with. But dont worry, you guys will get the latest updates... ;)


Shall rock my socks off.

Ta!

###

And my day was completed...

..when he smiled.

It was the perfect smile.
So bright and sunny and yummy.
My knees turned wobbly and I was gurgling like a baby...slurred and incoherent speech and all.
All that was coherent were "oh god..so cute..so cute..oh my freaking god..so cute".

Good bye my sambal boy.
Till we meet again.

Waaah...my heart aches already.




P/S: For some strange reasons, I have old skool Chinese singer Sky Wu's song in my head. You know..the one that goes "de bie de ai gei de bie de ni.." I think it means "special love for a special you" or something like that. Sigh....


P/S/S: I woke up REALLY late at 0830hrs and had to cab my way down to work. Total damage? $15!


(emailed)


###

Hey now, you're a rockstar

It’s almost 02450hrs and I am just having my dinner. I was so tired after reaching home from work/Comex that I fell asleep immediately (okay..after texting a couple of messages) on my bed. I just woke up about 2 hours ago and was miffed that there was no food. Then 10 minutes ago, I just found out that there was chicken rice in the fridge.

Anyway…

HAPPY TEACHERS’ DAY TO ALL TEACHERS…the favourite being Miss Wong Weiling of Jiemin Primary School. Babe, I know the going is tough for you right now. But don’t give up hope, okay?


You have been nothing short of awesome and inspiring.
And I really respect your integrity.
Soldier on, teacher, soldier on.


And


HAPPY GRADUATION DAY TO SAHRIAH MOHD AMSAH…another graduate in my MSG – Moonie Support Group (or MSN=Moonie Support Network…which is better?). Congratulations, babe. You’ve come a long way.

I still remember you whining about not being able to be with Lauren, Susan and me back in Australia. But hey, you’ve made it, babe. I am sure them parents are very, very proud of you and so are we. But let’s not stop here. We’ll keep on pursuing for self-betterment and terus melompat lebih tinggi. Hooray!



I miss my long hair.
Gah!


(Ryan Star got kicked out of Rockstar: Supernova. Oh just as well since I think he is too emo for the band. Now I think Toby, Magni and Dilana will make a good last three.)


Today will be my last day at Discovery and honestly, I must say that my short stint here has been nothing short of amazing. The office is beautiful, the surrounding park is calming and the colleagues friends I made…they are fantastic. Yes, I am talking to you June, Selina, Hira, Nur, Kharul and Doris. I will also miss the crazy lunch breaks (Changi Airport’s Popeye's chicken are ..woohoo!) and the bitching over IM during office hours.











But most of all…I will miss my cute sambal-licious Chinese boy who serves at the Malay food stall over at Signature’s (nearby building) food court.



Why sambal-licious?
Because he is deliciously hot, duh! Whenever I bought food from him, he would always ask if I wanted chilli. And without fail, I would always (meekly) say “Yes, please” … and when I got back to the office, I would scrape the chilli paste away for I am not actually a chilli-person. That boy could be selling babi trotters and I would still buy.

[Adrian, the next time you pop down to Signature for lunch, can you take a nicer picture of the Chinese boy? He is at the Glory Catering Malay food stall…beside the popular Indian stall. Thank you.]

Heh. These little things make life very bearable, you know!

Oh yeah!

Popped down to Comex @ Expo and man…everything was so happening. June bought a Nintendo mini-console for about $247 and it looked so..cool. Die, I also want…can play during breaks in school. Anyway I set my eyes on some Creative MP3 players and a Brother printer. Will get them after work later. Or, maybe on Saturday. I shall be there before they open the doors.

Wow. It’s already 0500hrs!
And I haven’t started on my article!
But it’s okay cause it’s the weekend and hey… I’ve got you, babe.


See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you
With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And I'm waiting for you
With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied
My body bruised, she's got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away – With or Without You, U2


Oh well.

A thousand times goodnight, tech geeks of the world unite.


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