Ya lah!

At the Sentosa Experiential museum.


###

What would I do...

My dad has been on my mind lately, ever since he shared the health scare with us. Nothing else to say without me feeling all sick in the stomach thinking about it. So here's Drew Holcomb & the Neighbours.



Sometimes I wake up with a sadness
Other days, it feels like madness
So, what would I do without you

When colors turn to shades of gray
With the weight of the world at the end of the day
Oh, what would I do without you

A decade goes by without a warning
And there's still a kindness in your eyes
Amidst the questions and the worry
A peace of mind always takes me by surprise

I feel like I'm walking with eyes as blind
As a man without a lantern in a coal mine
Oh, what would I do without you

My imagination gets the best of me
And I'm trying to hide
Lost at sea
Oh, what would I do without you

The difference between what I've said and done
And you're still standing by my side
A guilty soul and a worried mind
I will never make it
If I'm on my own

So you got the morning
I got midnight
You are patient
I'm always on time
Oh, what would I do without you

You got your sunshine
I got rain clouds
You got hope
I got my doubts

So, what would I do without you
Oh, what would I do without you
Oh, what would I do without you

###

Bay

After a night at Marina Bay Sands with dear ole Meiling, it is time to go to work.

Birthday's over.

Life goes on.


###

The end sums up the beginning

May it get better.

Happy birthday!

:)


###

Meet Eve

It's the day before the first day of my 33rd life. How do I feel?

Amidst all the health scare happening around me, I feel blesses that I still have the chance to turn older. I never thought I could live beyond 28. Silly, I know.

So yes...32nd year has been bizarre. Slightly chaotic. But the highlight was that I got to go to Italia - something I didnt think I could do in my 20s.

So...here's to another good age. More rounded and a curvier set of numbers.

Thank you my friends for celebrating it witb me.

###

And the award goes to...(a rehearsal)

Am hating this new Blogger layout. Will transfer to Wix soon, I swear. But, in time.


ANYWAY of all the things I recorded in this still-surviving-but-gasping-for-air blog, I didnt explain the medical check-up that I had last week. It was the check-up of my life so far and what came out of it wasnt really good.

But I am not in any mood to pen that down. Illness comes and goes, I guess. And I think constant worrying will feed it further. So, I'll just try to live well and hope for the best.
It's almost mid-January and that means...aaah...the birthday is coming. 33 - what a number.Double the curves, double the bends. Not sure if things will be smooth-sailing but I am sure whatever it is, it will be interesting.

With the passing of January, it also means that the frantic season of the Academy Awards, aka Oscars, is coming. In fact, the nomination list was officially out last night and damn, so many movies I have to see before the actual day on 25 Feb.
The movies are slowly being released and if I cannot catch all (of course I cant. Wreck-It Ralph is not my thing!), I at least need to clear my Best Picture roll.

*breathes*
Here goes nothing.
Will only make predictions a few days before the day itself, after I see most, if not all of the movies.

Best Picture
"Beasts of the Southern Wild"
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Zero Dark Thirty"
"Lincoln"
"Les Miserables"
"Life of Pi"
"Amour"
"Django Unchained"
"Argo

Best Supporting Actor
Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "The Master"
Robert De Niro, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Alan Arkin, "Argo"
Tommy Lee Jones, "Lincoln"

Best Supporting Actress
Sally Field, "Lincoln"
Anne Hathaway, "Les Miserables"
Jacki Weaver, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Helen Hunt, "The Sessions"
Amy Adams, "The Master"

Best Director
David O. Russell, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Ang Lee, "Life of Pi"
Steven Spielberg, "Lincoln"
Michael Haneke, "Amour"
Benh Zeitlin, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Actor
Daniel Day Lewis, "Lincoln"
Denzel Washington, "Flight"
Hugh Jackman, "Les Miserables"
Bradley Cooper, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Joaquin Phoenix, "The Master"

Best Actress
Naomi Watts, "The Impossible"
Jessica Chastain, "Zero Dark Thirty"
Jennifer Lawrence, "Silver Linings Playbook"
Emmanuelle Riva, "Amour"
Quvenzhané Wallis, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Original Screenplay
"Zero Dark Thirty"
"Django Unchained"
"Moonrise Kingdom"
"Amour"
"Flight"

Best Adapted Screenplay
"Lincoln"
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Argo"
"Life of Pi"
"Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Best Animated Feature
"Frankenweenie"
"The Pirates! Band of Misfits"
"Wreck-It Ralph"
"Paranorman"
"Brave"

Best Foreign Feature
"Amour"
"A Royal Affair"
"Kon-Tiki"
"No"
"War Witch"

Best Visual Effects
"Life of Pi"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"The Avengers"
"Prometheus"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Cinematography
"Skyfall"
"Anna Karenina"
"Django Unchained"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"

Best Costume Design
"Anna Karenina"
"Les Miserables"
"Lincoln"
"Mirror Mirror"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Documentary Feature
"Searching for Sugar Man"
"How to Survive a Plague"
"The Gatekeepers"
"5 Broken Cameras"
"The Invisible War"

Best Documentary Short
"Open Heart"
"Inocente"
"Redemption"
"Kings Point"
"Mondays at Racine"
"Snow White and the Huntsman"

Best Film Editing
"Lincoln"
"Silver Linings Playbook"
"Life of Pi"
"Argo"
"Zero Dark Thirty"

Best Makeup and Hairstyling
"Hitchcock"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"Les Miserables"

Best Music (Original Score)
"Anna Karenina"
"Argo"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall"
Best Music (Original Song)
"Before My Time" from "Chasing Ice"
"Everybody Needs A Best Friend" from "Ted"
"Pi's Lullaby" from "Life of Pi"
"Skyfall" from "Skyfall"
"Suddenly" from "Les Misérables"

Best Production Design
"Anna Karenina"
"The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey"
"Les Misérables"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"

Best Short Film, Animated
"Adam and Dog"
"Fresh Guacamole"
"Head over Heels"
"Maggie Simpson in 'The Longest Daycare'"
"Paperman"

Best Short Film, Live Action
"Asad"
"Buzkashi Boys"
"Curfew"
"Death of a Shadow (Dood van een Schaduw)"
"Henry"

Best Sound Editing
"Argo"
"Django Unchained"
"Life of Pi"
"Skyfall"
"Zero Dark Thirty"


Best Sound Mixing
"Argo"
"Les Misérables"
"Life of Pi"
"Lincoln"
"Skyfall"
Gonna camp in cinemas when I am not at work.


###

Are we humans?

Now I know 3/4 of the story.

How can a heart be so cold?

How can a love grow so old?

We will never ever ever ever get back together, said Taylor Swift.

And with that, the chapter ends.


P/S: No...not my love story which os yet to find a parking spot.

Down all around in and out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hphfK8YMphc&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I am not embarrassed to say I can rap to this filth.

Till this day.


###

Discuss Disgust

Four days into the new year and already I feel god damn dirty.

No...I am.

Right now I am just so disgusted, upset and at my wits' end with...myself.

Hope this is not a sign of a stinking year.


...touche.


###

Satyricon

Spending quality time with my Queen...my fairy godmother, Kylie Minogue.

Happy new year, Queen Mother.


###

Ringleader

My favourite?

Queen's Show Must Go On.

Indeed 2013.

###

Buon anno

First post of 2013. Hope this marks a good year. The zodiac predicts a lousy year but seriously, it read a crappy one last year too and all the years before. So as usual, horoscopes to the curb. Never a fan of them cause they're all a farce. I wrote them myself when I was a radio presenter.

Oops.
Did I say that?

So what did you do last night? I rung in the New Year in the middle of a road, crossing a traffic light after watching a really sad French movie called 'Amour'.

It's about this old man who struggled through to take care of his wife who had stroke...and then when she was in so much pain, he smothered her with a pillow to end it all.

While watching the show I remembered Bibik's last days at the hospital 3 years ago. Just like that. Her gasping...her soft moaning...okay let's stop this now.

2012. What was your highlight? Mine definitely were my travel stories.

This time in 2012, I just came home from Bali after a night of great kampung partying under the stars. I had a good trip to Hong Kong in March with the parents, sister and Lexie and finally got to share my passion for Hong Kong with the people I love.

Then somewhere in April (or May?), I had a really short break and headed to Krabi with the sister for some sea loving. I got a really cool accommodation...had the pool just steps away from my bed...and spent most of my time in the water. Cause I am such a sea baby, I took my country bumpkin sister island hopping around Phi Phi island and swim/snorkel. I really fell in love with Krabi and have plans of heading back :)

But of course my ultimo highlight was my 15-day adventure in Italia with Lauren and Jing.

Milan, Venice, Tuscany (Florence, Pisa, San Gimignano, Arezzo, San Giovanni), Vatican and Rome...we walked through them all till my soles were cobbled-beaten. I even managed to squeeze a football match between AS Roma (Totti!!) and Bologna at the majestic Stadio Olimpico. Oh...and Liz's wedding at the beautiful Villa Barberino at the Tuscan countryside. My, that was a great day.

Of course I got a lot of flak for taking a 2-week leave from work. I was told that in future, I couldnt take such a long leave. That got me really ruffled and immediately I felt so suffocated...chained with an iron ball at my feet. Still I had to be above my emotions and hung on.

Yes. It's just that but I felt that 'commandment' was the heaviest sentence to befall on me. Not that I was planning to go away for two weeks again every month but to know that I couldnt do it anymore made my heart ache so badly. I couldnt imagine not doing what I love most - to travel far and wide.

To not be able to go away after a period of being a rat in a sad rodent life (modern life is rubbish) is devastating. Four months after and I am still hurt. It undermined the euphoria I felt while in Italy. I felt angry upon return.

But I have let it past. At 32, I am less angry. I dont resign (myself to fate) but I have learnt to be diplomatic, pragmatic, elastic...fantastic..etc. I believe strongly in karma and I let God now do the judging.

So help me, God.

Love-wise...2012 must be one of the most boring years in that aspect. Sure, heart fluttered a few times but none was strong enough to turn into something else.

BUT it is okay. I have seen marriages rocky enough for me to stay away. Though I love the idea of a matrimonial union, I'm not the sort who grovel and bemoan of the lack thereof.

No...never the grovelling and clingy kind. What kind of love requires one to be like that anyway? Where pride goes on the line? Where you hang yourself out to dry?

Hah. Maybe that's why I am still single. Never take things serious enough to be beyond myself. Ah. It is okay.

So 2013. Just want to be happy. To do what I love. To get what I deserve. To feel what I am worth. All that constitute to being happy.

Oh...of course to spend time with my nieces and parents before they get too old.

Too old to hang out with their cool auntie. Too old to live.

Happy new year, my friend.


###

The last one

Weather's cool, stomach's full.

Are we ready for the last nap of the year?

Join me!

zzzzzzzzz


###

Should I speak of love?

I don't know how to love him.
What to do, how to move him.
I've been changed, yes really changed. 
In these past few days, when I've seen myself, 
I seem like someone else.

I don't know how to take this. 
I don't see why he moves me.
He's a man. 
He's just a man. 
And I've had so many men before, 
In very many ways, 
He's just one more.

Should I bring him down? 
Should I scream and shout? 
Should I speak of love, 
Let my feelings out? 

I never thought I'd come to this. 
What's it all about?

Don't you think it's rather funny, 
I should be in this position. 
I'm the one who's always been 
So calm, so cool, 
No lover's fool, 
Running every show. 
He scares me so.

I never thought I'd come to this. 
What's it all about?

Yet, if he said he loved me, 
I'd be lost.
I'd be frightened. 
I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope. 
I'd turn my head.
 I'd back away. 
I wouldn't want to know. 
He scares me so. 
I want him so. 
I love him so. - I Don't Know How To Love Him

Well that's from Jesus Christ Superstar...one of those musicals I am dying to watch. Anyhow, that's not the point. I was brought back to this song just about recently, thanks to watching my friends' marital experiences.

I have seen a few things and boy, did they scare the living spinster out of me. Just how much do we know the person we have come to share our lives with? Is it important to lay out the cards before we choose to be known as man and wife? How on earth did those couples who went through arranged marriage did it and manage to stay married forever?

How can we not bite the fruits of temptation and not succumb to adultery, doubt, jealousy? Is faith enough not to make us weak? If that's the case, why have we heard cases of men and women of faith succumbing? If we use the notion that we are only humans, then what should we be to avoid all these?

By becoming...better humans?
By not being humans?
What?

I am not thinking too much. If you were to ask my boss, she would tell you that I dont think at all (gee, thanks boss). These are just some questions which arose recently from real-time situations. Being someone who is really cautious when it comes to relationships, I wonder if many couples really know the people they are marrying.

Were they caught up on the romantic notion of a beautiful wedding? Were they caught up on the idea of growing old with kids surrounding them that they forgot to focus on the 'now'? How did the love they plant become so toxic over a period of time? Are married couples allowed to just stop trying and call it quits?

We always say God have the answers (sorry, not them Smarties chocolates) and we always take things that happen to us as signs from him. For example, constant miscarriages mean you are not fated to have a baby, three motorcycle accidents mean riding pillion is not for you, etc...but strangely, missing three meals dont make you stay away from food forever. Heartaches dont make you stop wanting to find love.

So why should you quit trying just because you have a setback or two...or five?


###

Almost an exit

They made up their minds
And they started packing
They left before the sun came up that day
An exit to eternal summer slacking
But where were they going without ever knowing the way?

They drank up the wine
And they got to talking
They now had more important things to say
And when the car broke down they started walking
Where were they going without ever knowing the way?

Anyone could see the road that they walk on is paved in gold
And it's always summer, they'll never get cold
They'll never get hungry
They'll never get old and gray
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere
They wont make it home
But they really don't care
They wanted the highway
They're happy there today, today

The children woke up
And they couldn't find 'em
They left before the sun came up that day
They just drove off and left it all behind 'em
But where were they going without ever knowing the way?

Anyone could see the road that they walk on is paved in gold
And it's always summer, they'll never get cold
They'll never get hungry
They'll never get old and gray
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere
They wont make it home
But they really don't care
They wanted the highway
They're happy there today, today - The Way, Fastball

...

My January theme song.

Why?

Stay tune.



###

Luke 14:10

Crashing a staycation.

But...where's the people?


###

Look closer

Just woke up and I thought...wow...it's almost Xmas and that means the year is coming to an end.

That means, January is nearing (o, Sherlock!) and that my birthday is almost here.

I examined my face and my...how it has aged.



Need to find someone who'll appreciate this face pronto before it continues to oxidise.

Heh.

###

Let's get lost tonight

I can always count on 1 December night every year where worries go out of the window. A night where we dont judge others and we're all out to have mindless fun.

Last night was that night.

After whole day spent covering the award show (work), I found myself in the company of some old friends (0030hrs!!) at a cozy cafe at Hong Kong Street.

Things got crazy...as always and we ended up 2 hrs later at a gay bar at Tanjong Pagar where I:

* Waited in line for the toilet, waiting for 2 men to finish their deed inside the cubicle

* Promised TB that we're going to get married in 4 years' time and that I'll wait for him to buy a house

* Danced with 2 men at the same time. 2 gay men..

* Chatted rubbish with a pair of happy men.

Got home at 0500hrs.

Twas a good night.

Love you, guys.


###

Elementary school massacre

Elementary school massacre: 27 killed, including 20 kids, at Connecticut school


Woke up to such sad news.


...guns...

Seven Days

"Seven Days" was all she wrote
A kind of ultimatum note
She gave to me, she gave to me
When I thought the field had cleared
It seems another suit appeared
To challenge me, woe is me
Though I hate to make a choice
My options are decreasing mostly rapidly
Well we'll see
I don't think she'd bluff this time
I really have to make her mine
It's plain to see
It's him or me

Monday, I could wait till Tuesday
If I make up my mind
Wednesday would be fine, Thursday's on my mind
Friday'd give me time, Saturday could wait
But Sunday'd be too late

The fact that he's six feet ten
Might instill fear in other men
But not in me, The Mighty Flea
Ask if I am mouse or man
The mirror squeaked, away I ran
He'll murder me in time for his tea
Does it bother me at all
My rival is Neanderthal, it makes me think
Perhaps I need a drink
IQ is no problem here
We won't be playing Scrabble for her hand I fear
I need that beer

Monday, I could wait till Tuesday
If I make up my mind
Wednesday would be fine, Thursday's on my mind
Friday'd give me time, Saturday could wait
But Sunday'd be too late

Seven days will quickly go
The fact remains, I love her so
Seven days, so many ways
But I can't run away

Monday, I could wait till Tuesday
If I make up my mind
Wednesday would be fine, Thursday's on my mind
Friday'd give me time, Saturday could wait
But Sunday'd be too late
Do I have to tell a story
Of a thousand rainy days since we first met
It's a big enough umbrella
But it's always me that ends up getting wet

I am meeting Sting tonight for some...ahem...adult company.
Well, even though he's billion of years older, Sting is still a hot, sexy beast to me.
That voice.
Oh!

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