The kill

Nabei chee bye.

Had my one-on-one just now and well...it was a showdown all in the name of "constructive criticism". Quoting Keith from Project Runaway:


"There are constructive criticism and there are insults."


Had I not been overwhelmed by my flu (feverish chills, running nose, the works), I would have probably burst into tears. I put on an indignant front and I think that vexed "It" more. "It" went on and on...I took everything in though I had the urge to sneeze in It's face. But, after It accused me of so many things, I dont want "violent and crazy" to be in the list too. Though I really want to strangle It.

It said a lot of things and apparently, some of the things came from the colleagues. Now...be a man/woman whatever. Tell me if you are not happy. Dont go running to your mummy's chest. If you dare to speak up your mind, then own what you say and step up. Walao..bloody basket.

Is It indirectly telling me to leave?

One thing I learn today (yeah yeah it just hit me..how dumb), people at work cannot be trusted - both colleagues and students alike. They're all nice to you if they need help. Once you say something that doesnt go well with their ears, they'll run to higher power without even trying to clarify things. I can understand the immaturity of some students...but how do you explain colleagues? And all done behind the cloak of anonymity?


Ass wipe cowards.


Maybe teaching is really not my thing. To all my students, I am sorry for negatively influencing your life <-- that was what It was hinting by the way. That I have been negatively influencing people...from students to colleagues. It made me sound like I have been teaching my students how to become fundamentalist terrorist, alcoholic, drug abusers, sex maniacs, thieves and other heinous criminals. Again, never overestimate others' thinking ability, hor.

Friends (at least I think they are...they havent stabbed me..yet) told me to just let it pass. Come on. Isnt it disheartening to know that your superior has such skewed opinion about you? What are you going to do next?

(a) Be extra nice and bend your back to make sure they change their impression

or

(b) Just continue to be who you are and hope that people will just ... get it?


Most people will go for (a) but...but..walandey...you did nothing wrong, sia!@#$@#$

...
...
...

Was so tempted to call it quits. But then again, I shouldnt let others' insecurity stop me from my financial joy and shopping.

But, it's about pride. There's only so much bruising I can take within that 20 minutes.

Urgh.
I just have to resort to cursing.

To the colleagues who said those things about me without any basis or allowance for my defence, I curse you.

To the students who said those things which I didnt...without any basis or allowance for my defence, I curse you and your parents for ill breeding.

A plague on both your houses.
A plague on both your houses.
A plague on both your houses.


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