Woman Trouble

My nerves have gone all Woody Allen on me.
No it is not because of the first date thingy.
There's more to this scandalous part of my life.
Right.


Let's just call him Specimen A or Franco. I've got a few messages from him in class today and well, receiving them made me nervous and gave me tummy knots. Not in a good way, for sure. He wanted it to be tonight. I lied and told him I have class till 2200hrs. I would have said till midnight but that's stretching it. I am still feeling sick just thinking of the possibility. I am sure he is a nice guy but it's just that ... I..I..I dont want to be in an awkward position. Position, as in "situation" and not that kind of position.


Fine.
It's not you, it's me.


I still havent replied his last message. And he knows where I work. You may ask why am I feeling like this. I dont know. Like I said, I have a complex social disorder. I am neurotic to the bones and tensed and I definitely hate to be alone with a stranger. What the hell can I say to a stranger? And I'm a walking paranoia. Do I smell bad? Is that chocolate in my teeth? Is my hair too dry? Is my voice too loud? Is my speech slurring like it always does? Am I too eager? Too passive? Do I talk too much? Can I make lame jokes? When can I make them? How about dirty jokes? A racist one?


See?


And then there's Specimen B or EuropaDiscoDancer. This one is a bit complicated. Cant reveal much here lest I want more heckling from you guys. I just told Idaho about this over a drink 30 minutes ago and she hasnt stopped giving me the funny looks. Whatever it is, it is not my fault and I didnt do anything.

I told Idaho how EuropaDiscoDancer gave me the creeps. In fact, I told her how everyone was giving me the heebeejeebies and that I had become a socially inept person. Anyway, this EuropaDiscoDancer is an enigma. Wait, I think he thinks I am an enigma. Under normal circumstances I would be flattered but EuropaDiscoDancer is not a species of normal circumstances. Okay maybe he means no harm. Maybe I think too much. Maybe I am chicken shit. Maybe I cluck.


Maybe.


I am literally having cold feet. So kids, the lessons of the day are:

1) Never start what you cannot finish.
2) Wear warm clothes in a cold environment.
3) When unsure, be vague.


Go home, Ed.


P/S: I am gonna be on invisible mode on MSN for the time being. Just leave me a message. I'll be online when the sun doesnt shine.


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