A singleton's rabid rambling

Rushed down to AMK Central just now because the parents needed my help in paying for the jewellery that they bought. They needed another account because they had exceeded the withdrawal limit for the day. I don’t understand. What’s with those gold and crap? It is crass and oh-so-golden! So what if diamonds have no value? They look prettier.

Urgh!

Anyway...

Was talking to 2 old guy friends just now. Outcomes..outcomes.


Tristan: How’s the job search?
Ed: hmmm..sucky.
Tristan: Don’t be fussy…just grab anything that comes


What? Really…some friend, man. Just grab anything that comes. First, there must be something that comes to me right? If not, what can I grab? And well, if they are things coming my way, why cant I choose? If I just grab anything, trust me…you will hear my griping and complaining every single day and I will be totally miserable and fucked up. I hate it when working people make it sound so easy. Just because you are working…Just. Because. Pooh!

Anyway, Tristan was whining about his break-up with the girlfriend, who is of another religion. Whine whine whine…moan moan moan (I am such a good friend). Men.


Tristan: …but heart pain cos tell me, nowadays, where got girl who is not possessive, understanding, totally chin chy... simple is the word...


Where got girl?? Eh dey…open your eyes, lah! There are so many girls who are not possessive, understanding, totally chin chye..they are called fembots. Female robots, okay? Anyway, what’s the problem? Just like you said..”Don’t be fussy…just grab anything that comes” lah. Isnt that your theory? Hah. In your face!

Okay lame. But I just hate it when guys want girls who are so this-and that perfect…when personally I know that these guys are so not perfect. Men.

Then, haha, there’s the other one who is caught in a limbo of denial


BigBuFF@Lo says:
..i don’t want to smother her..must let her make the first move.
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
Lambat lah (you wait long long lah)…if you were to wait for a woman to make her move, you have to set aside a long period of time. It may not even happen!

Yup. No matter how modern times can get, most girls still wait for the men to make the first move. So if you keep on waiting, then you better set aside a long period of waiting time.


BigBuFF@Lo says:
love is stupid
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
Only when you are not getting any! Haha!


And well, we did talk/debate about many things. And I ended up shouting that “a woman cannot live without a man!” I am so sorry, Eves. I am so sorry.


BigBuFF@Lo says:
They better stay away from me…because I hate it when they leave me hanging
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
Haha. You know..there was a period of time I wanted to be a nun. I was tired of love and all its games
BigBuFF@Lo says:
Is that why you go Timor? Do humanitarian work?
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
Ah? Like Mother Teresa? Maybe…maybe. But then again I realize it’s hard. Not to have emotions, carnal desires…
BigBuFF@Lo says:
It’s easy for women. They can live without men. They have emotional support..female friends. Financially..can support themselves.
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
no..no..there are just so much female friends can help
BigBuFF@Lo says:
but man cannot live without a woman
BigBuFF@Lo says:
its a cliche....
BigBuFF@Lo says:
but its true....
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
no no no...women need men too!!
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
i cant believe i am saying this
Constanza: Love doctor in the house says:
i am letting my species down


I am weak.
I am so weak.
But..but.. I need my man, mah! But first, I just need to find him. Hah.

Where is my man?

Oh well...anyway. Let's do something else.

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Instructions: Go to your music player of choice and put it on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question. NO CHEATING.

How does the world see me?
Creep – TLC
(Thanks, man! Thanks a lot!)

Will I have a happy life?
I’ll Never Break Your Heart - BSB
(oh really? Really? Thank god for sappy boyband music)

What do my friends really think of me?
La Tortura (The Torture) - Shakira
(am I the torturer? Or the tortured?)

Do people secretly lust after me?
I’ll Never Get Over You Getting Over Me – Expose
(heheheheh)

How can I make myself happy?
All I Want – Toad the Wet Sprocket
(spot on)

What should I do with my life?
I Do – Boyz II Men
(get married!!!)

Will I ever have children?
Tetaplah Kau Menjadi Milikku – Radja (Be Mine Still)

What is some good advice for me?
All Through The Night – Ella Fitzgerald
(heheh…you know..do it. All through the night..kinky. I like!)

How will I be remembered?
Always On My Mind – Pet Shop Boys
(ahh..remember me as the gay retro dude???)

What is my signature dancing song?
Give Me Novocaine – Green Day
(a slow painful dance it seems)

What do I think my current theme song is?
Fixing A Broken Heart – Indecent Obsession
(ahh…)

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Runaway Train – Soul Asylum
(nice one!)

What song will play at my funeral?
Mr Bojangles – Robbie Williams
(sniff..sad)

What type of men/women do I like?
That’s Amore – Dean Martin
(amorous men?? I like)

What is my day going to be like?
Whatever (I Had A Dream) – Butthole Surfers
(nuff said)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hahaha…that was fun..although a bit lame. But fun, still. Try it guys…and see how it goes for you.

Anyway, received an sms from dear old Noreen. She is confirmed to be getting married in August. What? Few days ago you said in September! Oh come on! Must find partner? Argh!!!

*run around like a headless chicken*

Oh…congratulations, babe!

Hah.

2nd half of 2006 will be a pretty hectic matrimonial period. Must get something pink for Noreen’s wedding and because we are all very close, I think Liah, Weiling, Clara and I will definitely be roped into the preparations. Bridesmaids.


WAIT!


I had a revelation. There’s Weiling, Clara, Liah and Noreen. Does the phrase “four weddings and a funeral” come to mind?

Oh no… oh no… If I have to wait that long and be the last one, he better be charming like Hugh Grant.



Yeah…but way younger, okay?

Okay I have to stop this.
I am sounding like a rabid singleton.
Like Carrie Bradshaw on speed.

A thousand times goodnight, singletons and whores.

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